The other night I felt a total conviction to write a blog post addressed to my kids, mainly centered around my faith journey throughout these years.
I know I am rough and gruff and have been for a long time. I am aware that I have not always been the best example and I am so deeply sorry for that.
I hope you gain some understanding through my writings – what was really going on those years… I am an open book and this site is that book…
I want… i need you to know how important my faith is to me… how important FAITH is in general…. Yes, i came from a background were its embedded into everyones brains at a systematic level… Christian private school 13 years. Bible class every day, church every Sunday. I knew all the messages, scriptures, apologetics etc… I believe I truly accept Jesus into my heart at hume lake camp when I was 11/12 – it is when i totally surrendered, felt his goodness, his warmth and love and accepted Christ… I always had that foundation, miraculously it grew organically in spite of having it shoved down my throat…
Faith… my faith was the only thing that kept me going and here many times over.. Darkest of times, detox, fentanyl withdrawal, psych hospital, 5150, rehab, everything…. God was there with me. I had MY guardian angel protecting me. Thats is part of what i learned, after my spiritual awakening late Sept 2025 – I prayed for eyes to see and ears to hear… I have read expanded versions of the suppressed bible… learned realities of this earth are flat false. SO much… Christ welcomed me back, I surrendered my long standing and all sin, the demons were cast out in His name, another full surrender and I had the warmest, ‘Welcome back, we missed you’ – I broke down saying I am a shit Christian and not worthy, but it didn’t matter… it was a deep moment, I also learned in that moment to stop praying OUT, God is trinity yeah? so Father, Jesus, Holy Spirit inside US.. why are we not praying internally? Realizing God IS WITHIN US? I also saw the darkness, through our plane and beyond – I saw a swirling tornado of streams of swirling smoke. THEY had 1 purpose, disrupt our connection with God.
Why is “Jesus Christ” in a vain / profane way acceptable which Islam, Budism, Scientology is never considered. Feels like SYSTEMATIC suppression.
It is – this world is ran by Satanic, demonic baby eaters and it is absolutely horrible… this is satan god little god of this world and he is running wild. SO, with that… anther thing that has bolstered my faith and absolute concrete belief in Christ as King is the overwhelming amount of sick, darkness everywhere… however, we know there is a balance to this life and world… we know that WHERE THERE IS DARKNESS, THERE TOO IS LIGHT!
I have been attacked in many different ways these past 10 months – Its nearing insurmountable… but again… faith and love for my family… Kristen and you kids… and of course the rest of the extended.. but it is what we must lean to, our faith is the only way to survive this world and the next…
NEVER – ever under any circumstances can you accept the mark of the best, no right hand, no forehead, nothing… you will biblically seal your doom forever if you do… there is no going back, it is clear in the scriptures… death is a better option..
I love you all, Im not sure when or if ever i am going to tell people about this… but at least its out there.